Feeling lost after a friend's betrayal? Today’s episode tackles the pain, forgiveness, and strength needed to rise above it. Learn how to reclaim your self-worth and find peace amidst the storm with biblical wisdom and personal empowerment. Stories, scripture, and the opportunity for self-discovery at the Tobago Retreat await!
References in this episode
Join the Messy Can't Stop Her Sisterhood at https://www.facebook.com/groups/3204395256540448/
If you would love to share your story on the #MessyCantStopHer podcast, click here to let me know.
Thank you so much for listening.
Music Credit: https://indiefy.me/wanted-carter
Feeling lost after a friend's betrayal? Today’s episode tackles the pain, forgiveness, and strength needed to rise above it. Learn how to reclaim your self-worth and find peace amidst the storm with biblical wisdom and personal empowerment. Stories, scripture, and the opportunity for self-discovery at the Tobago Retreat await!
References in this episode
Join the Messy Can't Stop Her Sisterhood at https://www.facebook.com/groups/3204395256540448/
If you would love to share your story on the #MessyCantStopHer podcast, click here to let me know.
Thank you so much for listening.
Music Credit: https://indiefy.me/wanted-carter
Welcome to this episode of Messy Can’t Stop Her, I am your host Judith Kambia Obatusa – JKO. On today’s episode we are going to journey through the labyrinth of friendship. It is a journey that is often filled with twists and turns, highs and lows, joys and sorrows. Today we are going to look at the dark side where those we call friend hurt us, where we feel the sting of betrayal, and the ache of disappointment. We are going to see how the light of faith can guide us through the turmoil of friendship gone bad.
We've all been there, right? You think you have this ride-or-die connection with someone, you trust them with your secrets, your dreams, your whole messy self. And then...bam. The trust shatters. Maybe a broken promise, a hurtful lie, a realization that the person you thought you were close to wasn't who they seemed at all.
It feels like a punch to the soul. And then the aftermath – the waves of hurt, anger, and confusion crashing over you, threatening to drown you. The doubts swirl around you like a tempest, obscuring any glimpse of clarity. Suddenly, you're questioning everything. Was it something I did? Could I have prevented this? Was the friendship ever real? And the worst part? It can chip away at your self-esteem, leaving you wounded and vulnerable, questioning the very essence of who you are and leaving you feeling lost and unsure who to trust.
Maybe it was a best friend who spilled your deepest secret to the whole world. Maybe it was a business partner who stole your brilliant idea and took all the credit. Or maybe it was a romantic relationship that turned toxic, leaving you feeling exposed and vulnerable.
Friendship is a sacred bond ordained by the divine. It is a reflection of the love and fellowship that we share with our Creator. Like any earthly relationship, it is susceptible to the frailties of human nature – to betrayal, disappointment, and the ache of shattered trust.
Whatever the betrayal, it hurts. It stings. And it can be tempting to crawl into a hole and shut the world out. But my sisters, you don't have to stay there.
In the middle of that wreckage of shattered trust, there is an opportunity for growth. You see, it is in our darkest moments that we discover the true strength of our character, the resilience that resides within us all.
So how do we pick up the pieces? How do we mend our wounded hearts and reclaim our sense of self-worth? The answer does not lie in seeking revenge or dwelling on the past, but in finding the courage to forgive – both others and ourselves.
So, start by acknowledging the pain. Don't bottle it up. Talk to someone you trust, a therapist, a friend, whoever can offer a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on. Grieve the loss of the friendship you thought you had. It's okay to be angry, hurt, confused. Feel the hurt, anger, and confusion, then release it.
Amidst the wreckage of broken promises and shattered dreams, there is solace to be found in the words of scripture – in the timeless wisdom of the Holy Bible.
Proverbs 17:17 reminds us that "A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity." And yet, even Jesus himself experienced the sting of betrayal at the hands of his closest disciples, as recounted in Matthew 26:48-50 when Judas one of his 12 disciples and literal bosom buddies betrayed him.
But amidst the pain and turmoil, there is hope to be found in the promise of redemption. For just as Jesus forgave those who betrayed him, so too are we called to extend grace and compassion to those who have wronged us.
And to those who find themselves adrift in a sea of doubt and despair, this betrayal does not define you. You are strong, resilient, worthy of love and trust. Remember the words of Psalm 139:14 : "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well."
The answer to keeping our peace amidst the chaos of life's storms, and navigating the treacherous waters of betrayal and disappointment with grace and courage, lies not in seeking external validation or approval, but in embracing our own worth and value – in recognizing that we are fearfully and wonderfully made, in the image of our Creator.
Take this as a learning experience. What can you take away from this situation? How can you choose friends who align with your values? But most importantly, don't let this harden your heart. The world still needs your messy light, your kindness, your fierce loyalty.
Building new friendships takes time and vulnerability, but it's worth it. There are amazing people out there waiting to connect with you, people who will cherish your trust and reciprocate your loyalty.
But do you know that you are not alone? Imagine finding yourself in a community of women who get you. Yes that is what is happening at our upcoming Tobago Retreat? It's the perfect opportunity to focus on self-discovery, healing, and empowerment. It happened to me in 2021 and it can happen to you too.
Picture yourself on a beautiful beach in Tobago, surrounded by other strong, supportive women attending workshops on setting healthy boundaries, identifying toxic relationships, and most importantly, learning how to keep your peace and navigate challenging situations like broken relationships.
Amidst the sun-kissed beaches, the lush greenery, the gentle sway of palm trees in the ocean breeze. It's here, surrounded by the breathtaking beauty of nature, that we embark on a journey of self-discovery – a journey guided by the gentle wisdom of our inner voice and the unwavering grace of our Creator.
Psalm 46:10 reminds us to "Be still, and know that I am God," while Isaiah 41:10 assures us that "Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
This retreat is taking place from May 13 – 17 in Tobago is not just a physical destination, it is a sacred space for spiritual transformation – a place where we confront our deepest fears, embrace our true selves, and emerge stronger, wiser, and more resilient than ever before. It is about helping you rebuild your self-esteem and creating a life filled with genuine connections.
One more thing before we part ways today, My sister, yes you that is listening to me, you are a masterpiece in progress. Do not let anyone dim your shine. Isaiah 43:1 assures us, "But now thus says the Lord, he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are mine."
So pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and keep putting yourself out there. You deserve genuine connections, and they're waiting for you. This is just a bump in the road, not the end of your journey. You are messy, you are strong, and you can't be stopped!
Head over to the website I have linked in the show notes to learn more about the Tobago Retreat and book your spot. We can't wait to help you rise above this betrayal and embrace the amazing woman you are!
My sister, this is not about surviving these situations, it is about thriving. It is about learning from them, growing stronger, and building the life you deserve. You are capable of incredible things. Don't let anyone tell you differently.
So keep your head held high, My sister. You've got this. And if you need a little extra support, we'll be waiting for you in Tobago with open arms and sunshine.
I would like to leave you with this prayer – a prayer for healing, for restoration, and for the courage to forgive. Philippians 4:13 says: "I can do all this through him who gives me strength." When it seems hard, let this be your reminder that you have what it takes to rise above your circumstance and to find peace amidst the storm. When you do this, messy won’t stop you.
Thank you so much for listening, see you next time.